My First Black Eye
By Susan Altman

Date: Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Time: 12 noon
Place: Gate to the large pasture
Victim: Susan Altman (picture)
Perpetrator: Miles (picture)

Haste makes waste, as they say. I was pulling into the driveway on my way home from work, and in a hurry to let the horses out into the neighbors' pasture for a quick lunch. Colin and I had a chiropractor appointment at 1:30, so I only had an hour to let them graze before I needed to put them back into the big pasture for their hay meal.

I had opened the gate to the big pasture and Paddy and Miles were standing there. I had two halters and leadropes in my hand and was trying to untangle them when I pulled on one and it was stuck on the gate, so caused the gate to swing in unexpectedly. Which caused Miles to startle and throw his head up. In. To. My. Face. jesusfuckingchristgoddamnitmotherfucker is I think what came out of my mouth when I felt the impact. Ouch!

Surprisingly, this is the first time I have been knocked in the face by Miles. Paddy and I, on the other hand, have collided a couple times. And also surprisingly, I have never been bruised by the incidents, although both times I thought my nose was broken, and my neck hurt from being snapped back so suddenly.

In case you don't know, the average horse head weighs...a lot! I've read numbers from 15 lbs to 40 lbs (of course that depends on the size of the horse). So let's say it weight 25 lbs ('cause I need more sympathy). Imagine someone VERY strong, like a weightlifter for whom 25 lbs requires no effort to work with. Let's say said weighlifter winds up and swings a 25 lb barbell at you at full force. I guess that's the best analogy I can come up with to explain the blow that I took to my orbital bone on my right eye. Ok, maybe that is a bit of an exxageration; I'm not sure, as I've never been hit in the face with a barbell.

I immediately could feel and see the swelling out of the corner of my eye. Oh, yipee!!! My first shiner!!! Colin suggested I ice it, but I'm a tough farm girl and wanted to see what it was going to look like. So I haven't iced it. Five hours after the initial blow, my eye looked like this (picture). Colin thinks it will get worse, so we'll take more pictures tomorrow and the day after. (Isn't life on the farm exciting?)

Shine on fans, shine on!
- posted by Susan @ 7:31 PM